Better Late Than Never...

I started this blog for father's day in recognition of ALL fathers and wasn't able to complete it.  But I am going to see if I can go ahead and finish it now because it got me to thinking about my family (all of them). 

I didn't know my father, not because he ran off and didn't have anything to do with me, not because my mother tried to keep him away, and not because he died in war or of some health issue. 

My father died when I was very young; the only father I know is my mom.  The only image I have of my father was us (my father and I) on a pew both dressed in white.  There are several interesting things about that memory but the most interesting, for me, is that my mother said my father never went to church or weddings.  Where does that image come from?  What does it mean?  I don't know that I will ever know the real answer but my thoughts are that it relates to my father and his desire to protect his girls.  I have heard that he was a great father.  I often wonder what my life would be or would have been had my father actually been a part of it.  I am quite sure that things would have been different but not necessarily better or worse.

Every time I think about my father, I can't help but think about family and what that means.  What does that mean?  Every person that has a different view of what that term means.  For me, family represents the people that I am related-to (connected to) via blood ties or marriage.  Why does that definition seem so simple?  The definition is that simple.  If I were not related to most of the people in my family, we would probably not know each other or talk.  Somewhere, along the way we tried to force an interpretation or meaning behind family that just wasn't the case.

But wait, before we go any further let me make one thing very clear...I LOVE MY FAMILY AND WOULD NOT CHANGE A THING ABOUT THEM!!!  Is that clear?  Are there any questions at this point?  Get it?  Got it?  GOOD!

After everything is said and done, family members are people before they are anything else.  The same treatment or mistreatment that you get from plain people is the same treatment or mistreatment you can get from your family.  The funny thing about it is that we tend to excuse it from family.  So, this is the part that I always got backwards, I thought that when someone was your family, you were supposed to treat them better than you would the next person.  The hubby always tells me that I need to work on that thought.  I have taken his advice; I now work on reciprocating what I get.

What is my message in all of this? Regardless of who your parents are, we are all individuals.  Celebrate the differences in one another; they will give you broader perspective.  Stop trying to mold yourself and others into something you aren’t.  Realize that you are not going to like everyone or everything that your family likes.  The beauty of family is that it is the first opportunity in your life to be open to new and different things.